Song is one of the most powerful tools we can use in the midst of a struggle. I am sure we have all at some point in our lives turned on the radio to the highest decimal our ears allow, nodded our heads back and forth as if riding on the lull of a rhythmic sea, and mouthed the lyrics of our favorite song verbatim, crimping our faces in such a way that could be mistaken as pain when in fact we are just displaying the emotion that the song evokes in us. For about three minutes, we have released our tension into the makeshift microphone in the center of our steering wheels. We could care less about what Joe in the right hand lane thinks about our rendition of "I Will Survive"! Through song, we unlock the caged soul within us and watch it fly.
I have been teaching the past 2 1/2 years at a probation hall (or correctional facility) for high school students who have found themselves in trouble with the law. I have spent a good portion of this time in our compound unit, working with students labeled as "high-risk offenders". They primarily range from the ages of fourteen to eighteen. We house them at our school site for the duration of their trial. These particular students have lost their "fitness" in juvenile court, which means they are deemed no longer "fit" to enter back into society. They are then moved on to adult court where they are facing serious sentences. I have witnessed students shipped out of our facility, serving anywhere between 2 to 250 years in the state penitentiary.
Needless to say, I meet challenges daily in trying to motivate these adolescents to see the importance of earning a high school diploma. Their number one concern of course is being free from their cell walls. Between the stress of court and missing their families/friends, there is very little hope for many of them. Nonetheless, my duty as an educator remains the same. I am not only there to instruct, but I also play a part in the rehabilitation process. Our mission is to touch the lives of each student in hopes that they will one day make the choice to turn away from a life of crime and gang violence. In exchange, we offer them the resources they need in order to transition back into society as upstanding citizens, rising up as the future generation that will run this nation. I have taken it one step further and shared with many listening ears the gospel! All we need is to plant a seed and let God do the rest!
Today I entered into the unit where my students are housed, equipped with my lesson plan, stacks of paper, and pencils. I prepared for them a lecture on the American Indian Movement that took place in the 1960s, but little did I know that I would be receiving a lesson of my own. It all began when I introduced myself to a new student in the class. He shook my hand timidly, sunk down into the lustrous metallic stool Los Angeles county funds provide, and stared down at his paper. About a minute passed when suddenly this young gentleman rose from his desk and stated, "I heard that you can sing, Ms. J!" I started to reply, but before my mouth shaped around the letter "I", he abruptly continued, "I can sing too! I used to sing in the church choir and I sang for my grandmother's funeral!" Without delay, my student commenced a cataclysm of events that spiraled out of my control.
This young man began to sing. He placed his hand over his heart, clenched his gray t-shirt, and threw his head back as if he was watching the musical notes escape from his lips. After he concluded his rendition of "Sweet Sadie", the rest of the students and I applauded him. Then, another student jumped up from his desk and began to sing a song in a tongue unfamiliar to me. I believe the lyrics were in Spanish. I, like the other students, was unclear about the content of the song but nonetheless found comfort in his smooth, mellow tone. He extended his final note and then suddenly a beat was heard from the opposite side of the room. Another student began to tap the tip of his pencil to the metal desk, turning unseemingly percussive sounds into a full on drum ensemble. This young man began to perform a poem he wrote about his life struggles, how he wanted to walk away from his hood but was too afraid to try. Each phrasing perfectly fell into the intermittent gaps of the beat. I was overwhelmed by the orchestration that filled the room. Undoubtedly, these young men were in need of a therapy session, one their school psychologist couldn't provide. In this case, song served as the key, unlocking the cage door that bound their souls within the prison walls around them.
The incident that occured today reminds me of scripture in 1 Samuel 16:14-23. Saul was troubled by a stubborn distressing spirit that wouldn't flee. He was advised by his servants that only a skillful musician could help banish the unwanted spirit that bound him. They referred David, a harp player who came highly recommended, as the man for the job. We all know that David had a heart for the Lord and I imagine he played his instrument from his heart, with a fiery passion and zeal. It proved to work as scripture states, "Then Saul would become refreshed and well, and the distressing spirit would depart from him." (1 Samuel 16:23) It is revealed through scripture that music is powerful not only as a form of worship to God, but also as a means of healing.
Maya Angelou wrote a poem entitled, "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings". This piece was written during the civil rights movement, however, the message still rings true today. The caged bird is a symbolic figure as the tune the bird produces is a message of hope. This is evident in the following lines that repeat throughout the poem:
The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.
Maya Angelou must have known that the gift of song empowers, uplifts, and inspires not only the songbird but those who can hear its tune. I liken the three young men that I mentioned earlier to the caged bird in this poem. Song enables them to find strength, hope, and encourages those who listen. We may not be able to indentify with what it is like to be physically incarcerated, but how many of us find ourselves incarcerated spiritually? Think about anything that is incapacitating you from engaging in a fully enriched life in Christ. Your soul may be crying out for freedom with a "fearful trill". But, remember that God gave us a voice not to whimper in fear or distress but to sing over and through our circumstances. We don't sing only because we are happy. We sing and rejoice because our souls are free. Maybe your body has physically failed you, but you are not a slave to that hospital bed. Perhaps you are dealing with an addiction of some sort. Praise through the struggle of being released from it! Those four walls that encage your soul will soon come crumbling down! Massage your soul through song, release it, and watch it fly! Scripture in Ephesians 5:19 stresses the importance of "speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord". This is the way in which our souls thrive.
When we sing from our heart the way that David played his harp, we are guaranteed liberation. Galatians 5:1 states, "Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage". Live out this scripture daily. Many of my students do not know the Lord, but one thing they do know is that the instrument inherent within us provides comfort, encouragement, and strength. When we use it to glorify God, we find freedom!
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
A Healthy Appetite
I spent a few moments mind wrestling with God before writing this blog and it finally occurred to me in one of those ah hah moments that I will never win! Our tussle started over whether or not I should write about my reacquaintance with a long lost love. In my shameful defeat, I was reminded that honesty leads to victory not only for ourselves but for others. So, here I shall briefly and painlessly (I hope) devulge the juicy details. We were first introduced in college during one of my late night snack breaks in the south campus dining hall. Once I feasted my eyes upon this love interest, it was as if the gravitational pull of the moon dragged the stars into a locomotive alignment while the earth yielded in its last revolution around the sun in order to set the atmospheric mood around us. It came straight out of a love scene from one of those cliche chick flicks where everything, including the two star-gazed lovers, moves in slow motion. It was sweet, delectable, and it costed me the dreaded freshman fifteen (pounds). But, how could I resist slightly melted milk chocolate morsels embedded in rich layers of oozing contentment, perfectly moist in the inside, yet slightly crisp around the edges? Yes, dear readers, it is sad to admit, but true. I have reunited with Betty Crocker's creation, searching for comfort at the bottom of a box labeled "Traditional Chewy Brownie Mix".
In all seriousness though, I believe I am not alone in this dramatization, although yours might be slightly less exaggerated. We have all in some form or fashion fallen short due to a vice, whether it be the aching desires of our sweet tooth or persistent profanity. You can fill in the blank on what that means for you. But let's first define "vice". Webster's dictionary defines the term as a "fault, defect, or shortcoming". It can also be described as a "bad habit". Research has shown that it takes 21 days to form a habit, good or bad. As you continue to read further, I encourage you to think of anything that has taken root in your life and established itself as a bad habit. Depending upon how you perceive it, it may be major or minor to you. Nonetheless, it has a hold on you, taking up mental space and/or precious hours out of the day, tempting you, and preventing you from experiencing complete freedom of the flesh. A major vice could be sexual immorality, addictions to a controlled substance, excessive drinking, etc. I think of a minor vice as something as small as biting our finger nails.
This reminds me of a time that I was at the nail shop, eavesdropping into a converation a young girl was having beside me as she was getting her nails done. She shared with the nail technician that she was ten years old and that the reason her mom was allowing her to get acrylics was because she had a nervous habit of biting her nails. Before she could continue, the nail technician, now seemingly interested in what she had to say, put down his cuticle clipper, looked her square in the eye, and abruptly stated, "There are alternatives to biting your nails. I get nervous all the time, but you don't see me biting mine!" The girl giggled to herself uncomfortably. But, I could tell that she knew he was right. I will withold my opinion or whether or not I believe ten year-old girls should wear fake nails and focus on the matter at hand. If we were to flesh out the underlying issue of this real life scenario, we would find that this young girl was taught by her mother that if the habit can't be broken, you can mask it. Now, I know there isn't much cause for concern in this example. I have heightened and highlighted the issue to meerly illustrate my point.
My personal testimony indicated the beginning stages of a habit forming process, one many people are all too familiar with. Clearly, my want superceded my need. Now, I realize that a healthy appetite is a God-granted desire. Overindulgence is when it becomes problematic. Not only that, but it sets a precedence over our desire to seek God first. We may be subconsciously (or consciously) filling a void much deeper than an empty tummy. If this were not so, I would have eaten to contentment and would be satisfied. Being creatures of habit, we find comfort in the temporary fixes our world around us provides, far too easily at that, until voila...twenty-one days later...you have found yourself a new habit to add to the collection!
May I remind you, that this is a tactic the enemy knows far too well! In the very beginning of God's word, we find Adam and Eve tempted by the same food God created for our good. Scripture states, "And the Lord God commanded the man saying, 'Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.'" (Genesis 2:16-17) God told Adam directly that he would die if he disobeyed His command. The looming threat of death STILL didn't deter Adam from tasting the forbidden fruit. This goes to show not even death is enough to deter us from our own unsatiable desires! I thank God we now have the gift of His grace!
Just as the serpent tempted Eve, we too are tempted by a multitude of things, including our appetite. I think of how many of us undervalue the fulfilling richness born of the earth, in our fruits, vegetables, and water. When we start introducing processed foods, loaded with sugar and sodium, into our diets daily, we are not only compromising our physical health, but we are also defiling our temple. We are feeding off of a temporary satisfaction that serves no true nutrional value. The first chapter in the book of Daniel reveals that after an invitation to eat of the meats and sweets king Nebuchadnezzar provided to those who might eventually serve him, "Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king's delicacies, nor with the wine which he drank." (Daniel 1:8) He instead proposed a challenge. While the other servants would partake in the king's spread, he and his brothers would only drink water and eat vegetables for ten days. This was to prove that the king's delicacies served no nutrional value, physically or spiritually. So, it happened that after ten days, Daniel and his brothers were in far greater physical standing than the other servants.
This chapter serves us a double portion of truth, promoting physical and spiritual well-being. When Daniel took a stand against the enticing lure of the king's table, he made up his mind that the food prepared was of no value to him. After ten days, not only was he stronger and in better health than the rest of the servants, but he also found himself in right-standing with God. This time spent in devotion to Him was blessed with wisdom and "understanding in all visions and dreams." (Daniel 1:17) In practical application, when we unclutter the body and the mind of the very thing the enemy tries to pour into us, we are far more in tune with God's presence in our lives. Many people engage in spiritual fasts for this purpose.
This example can also be applied to our lifestyle choices. We may be trying to fill that void, searching for temporal gratification by various means, such as carousing in our local bars every single weekend, spending hours surfing the internet, or spending money frivolously, etc. These are all vices that serve as bait to entice us farther and farther away from the one true source of nutritional value for our lives, God's word. Imagine if we fed on His word daily and drank of His living water. I believe we would be like Daniel, in great spiritual and physical health.
In addition to this, I have become leery of products labeled boldly with words that read "fat free" or "high in vitamin c". If it has to convince you that it serves a purpose, chances are that it is overcompensating for what it lacks. When is the last time you saw a banana peel with a label that reads "Rich in Potassium"? This same idea applies to other areas of our lives. If we remember to stick to the basics, the bare essentials, we will find ourselves in a world rid of the noise and distractions. Our lives will be less cluttered and more in tune to God's voice. I think about how our ancestors as written in scripture often audibly heard the voice of God. I believe that removing the vices from our life is like removing the constant noise in our daily soundtrack. It will fine tune our listening skills and open us up to hearing God clearly and soundly. Why do you think the enemy tries so hard to keep us routinely distracted with temporary gratifications?
I challenge you to start a new habit in the next 21 days: engage in God's word daily. I am sure we will receive our fill and be content. Our appetites will be satiated with rich text that is more gratifying than our favorite dessert. During our 21-day challenge, I will earnestly try to put aside the brownies and feast on the richly fulfilling morsels of knowledge instead. As it takes 21 days to form a habit, it takes just as long to break one. So, think of a few vices that you would like to release during this time. Let's regroup in a few weeks and share with one another our results. I am sure we will be empowered, strengthened, and fulfilled! Remember a healthy appetite promotes a healthy heart, pumping invaluable nutrients into our emotional, physical, and spiritual make-up!
God bless you, brothers and sisters. Until next time...be encouraged!
In all seriousness though, I believe I am not alone in this dramatization, although yours might be slightly less exaggerated. We have all in some form or fashion fallen short due to a vice, whether it be the aching desires of our sweet tooth or persistent profanity. You can fill in the blank on what that means for you. But let's first define "vice". Webster's dictionary defines the term as a "fault, defect, or shortcoming". It can also be described as a "bad habit". Research has shown that it takes 21 days to form a habit, good or bad. As you continue to read further, I encourage you to think of anything that has taken root in your life and established itself as a bad habit. Depending upon how you perceive it, it may be major or minor to you. Nonetheless, it has a hold on you, taking up mental space and/or precious hours out of the day, tempting you, and preventing you from experiencing complete freedom of the flesh. A major vice could be sexual immorality, addictions to a controlled substance, excessive drinking, etc. I think of a minor vice as something as small as biting our finger nails.
This reminds me of a time that I was at the nail shop, eavesdropping into a converation a young girl was having beside me as she was getting her nails done. She shared with the nail technician that she was ten years old and that the reason her mom was allowing her to get acrylics was because she had a nervous habit of biting her nails. Before she could continue, the nail technician, now seemingly interested in what she had to say, put down his cuticle clipper, looked her square in the eye, and abruptly stated, "There are alternatives to biting your nails. I get nervous all the time, but you don't see me biting mine!" The girl giggled to herself uncomfortably. But, I could tell that she knew he was right. I will withold my opinion or whether or not I believe ten year-old girls should wear fake nails and focus on the matter at hand. If we were to flesh out the underlying issue of this real life scenario, we would find that this young girl was taught by her mother that if the habit can't be broken, you can mask it. Now, I know there isn't much cause for concern in this example. I have heightened and highlighted the issue to meerly illustrate my point.
My personal testimony indicated the beginning stages of a habit forming process, one many people are all too familiar with. Clearly, my want superceded my need. Now, I realize that a healthy appetite is a God-granted desire. Overindulgence is when it becomes problematic. Not only that, but it sets a precedence over our desire to seek God first. We may be subconsciously (or consciously) filling a void much deeper than an empty tummy. If this were not so, I would have eaten to contentment and would be satisfied. Being creatures of habit, we find comfort in the temporary fixes our world around us provides, far too easily at that, until voila...twenty-one days later...you have found yourself a new habit to add to the collection!
May I remind you, that this is a tactic the enemy knows far too well! In the very beginning of God's word, we find Adam and Eve tempted by the same food God created for our good. Scripture states, "And the Lord God commanded the man saying, 'Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.'" (Genesis 2:16-17) God told Adam directly that he would die if he disobeyed His command. The looming threat of death STILL didn't deter Adam from tasting the forbidden fruit. This goes to show not even death is enough to deter us from our own unsatiable desires! I thank God we now have the gift of His grace!
Just as the serpent tempted Eve, we too are tempted by a multitude of things, including our appetite. I think of how many of us undervalue the fulfilling richness born of the earth, in our fruits, vegetables, and water. When we start introducing processed foods, loaded with sugar and sodium, into our diets daily, we are not only compromising our physical health, but we are also defiling our temple. We are feeding off of a temporary satisfaction that serves no true nutrional value. The first chapter in the book of Daniel reveals that after an invitation to eat of the meats and sweets king Nebuchadnezzar provided to those who might eventually serve him, "Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king's delicacies, nor with the wine which he drank." (Daniel 1:8) He instead proposed a challenge. While the other servants would partake in the king's spread, he and his brothers would only drink water and eat vegetables for ten days. This was to prove that the king's delicacies served no nutrional value, physically or spiritually. So, it happened that after ten days, Daniel and his brothers were in far greater physical standing than the other servants.
This chapter serves us a double portion of truth, promoting physical and spiritual well-being. When Daniel took a stand against the enticing lure of the king's table, he made up his mind that the food prepared was of no value to him. After ten days, not only was he stronger and in better health than the rest of the servants, but he also found himself in right-standing with God. This time spent in devotion to Him was blessed with wisdom and "understanding in all visions and dreams." (Daniel 1:17) In practical application, when we unclutter the body and the mind of the very thing the enemy tries to pour into us, we are far more in tune with God's presence in our lives. Many people engage in spiritual fasts for this purpose.
This example can also be applied to our lifestyle choices. We may be trying to fill that void, searching for temporal gratification by various means, such as carousing in our local bars every single weekend, spending hours surfing the internet, or spending money frivolously, etc. These are all vices that serve as bait to entice us farther and farther away from the one true source of nutritional value for our lives, God's word. Imagine if we fed on His word daily and drank of His living water. I believe we would be like Daniel, in great spiritual and physical health.
In addition to this, I have become leery of products labeled boldly with words that read "fat free" or "high in vitamin c". If it has to convince you that it serves a purpose, chances are that it is overcompensating for what it lacks. When is the last time you saw a banana peel with a label that reads "Rich in Potassium"? This same idea applies to other areas of our lives. If we remember to stick to the basics, the bare essentials, we will find ourselves in a world rid of the noise and distractions. Our lives will be less cluttered and more in tune to God's voice. I think about how our ancestors as written in scripture often audibly heard the voice of God. I believe that removing the vices from our life is like removing the constant noise in our daily soundtrack. It will fine tune our listening skills and open us up to hearing God clearly and soundly. Why do you think the enemy tries so hard to keep us routinely distracted with temporary gratifications?
I challenge you to start a new habit in the next 21 days: engage in God's word daily. I am sure we will receive our fill and be content. Our appetites will be satiated with rich text that is more gratifying than our favorite dessert. During our 21-day challenge, I will earnestly try to put aside the brownies and feast on the richly fulfilling morsels of knowledge instead. As it takes 21 days to form a habit, it takes just as long to break one. So, think of a few vices that you would like to release during this time. Let's regroup in a few weeks and share with one another our results. I am sure we will be empowered, strengthened, and fulfilled! Remember a healthy appetite promotes a healthy heart, pumping invaluable nutrients into our emotional, physical, and spiritual make-up!
God bless you, brothers and sisters. Until next time...be encouraged!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
When I Consider How My Light Was Spent
John Milton, a mid-17th century English poet, wrote the heading of this blog. It is the title of a poem peppered in Shakespearean-esque verbiage, a little hard to swallow, but nonetheless, a work that promotes reflection and challenges my 11th grade English students to think outside the box. Any person familiar with period pieces such as this, knows how difficult it can be to unravel the hidden meaning behind doors locked in a foreign language. I realized this today as I looked up from the pages of my teacher's edition to find my eyes met with looks of perplexity and puzzlement. Some student picking his nose in the corner of the room returned a blank stare, just as we completed reading the title, almost deterring me from progressing forward and tugging these kids along through this poetic conundrum. However, by the time we completed a discussion that ensued, I was so glad we didn't jump ship prematurely. The following is the poem for your reference:
When I consider how my light is spent,
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one talent which is death to hide
Lodged with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest He returning chide;
"Doth God exact day-labor, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies, "God doth not need
Either man's work or His own gifts. Who best
Bear His mild yoke, they serve Him best. His state
Is kingly: thousands at His bidding speed,
And post o'er land and ocean without rest;
They also serve who only stand and wait."
After doing some research on John Milton, I found that he was in fact a Protestant. He was so swept up in the theological controversy of his era, that he dedicated his life and works to exposing the thread woven between God and the human condition. In some of his earlier works, Milton shares with his audience his desire to fulfill a life of servitude but grows anxious at the thought that time is not on his side. By the time Milton wrote "When I Consider How My Light Was Spent", he was 43 years old and completely blind. It is here that John Milton's tonal shift is felt. He was at one point a burning flame eager to fulfill God's will, but in this hilighted selection, the flame appears to be squelched. He is plagued with loss and sadness. Perhaps he has evaluated his life and regrets time passed, the very time spent walking away from his calling. Now that he is blind, he doubts if he is of any use at all.
A day prior to being introduced to this poem, I awoke very early in the morning. I turned on the soft glow lamp that resides by my couch, medidated, and prayed. It was then that God did something spectacular (nothing new for Him of course)! I felt a nudge in my spirit to stretch out both of my hands in an attitude of receiving. So, I did. I felt the Lord tell me that he was placing ten coins in my right hand and five coins in the other. He asked me which felt heavier. I felt a weight pierce through the palm of my left hand and my arm suddenly grew weak. I questioned this. Clearly, he had placed more coins in my right hand. I shuffled around in my back pack for my Bible, the living, breathing Word, and randomly opened to Matthew 25:14-30.
I am sure many of you are familiar with the parable Jesus told about the man who distributed his "talents" (a form of currency) to his three servants. As the story goes, he had plans to be away from his place of residence for some time. Before doing so, he left five talents with one servant. To the second servant, he gave two talents. Finally, the third servant received one talent. Scripture states he gave "to each according to his own ability." (Matthew 25:15) The man returns after some time and expects each servant to account for the money that was given him. The first two servants reveal to their lord that they invested the talents and received double their portion in interest. Their lord responds stating, "Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord." (Matthew 25:23) Then it was time for the third servant to account for the coin that was given to him. He admits to his lord that he buried his one talent because he was "afraid". (Matthew 25:25 [para]) "But his lord answered and said to him, 'You wicked and lazy servant, you knew that I reap where I have not sown, and gather where I have not scattered seed. So you ought to have deposited my money with the bankers, and at my coming I would have received back my own with interest." (Matthew 25:27) At the end of the parable, their lord takes the one talent from the last servant and gives it to the servant that has ten. He then casts out the "unprofitable" servant into "outer darkness". (Matthew 25:30 [para])
I encourage you readers to apply this scripture to your personal walk with God. We are all the Lord's servants, in whom He has entrusted particular talents. We may choose to sow these talents into the kingdom of heaven or not. That is our choice. I am not necessarily talking about our monetary investment. I am more or less referring to time invested, using the gifts God has dipersed amongst us to edify one another and most importantly, to reap a harvest of souls. "'The harvest truly is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.'" (Matthew 9:37-38) Just as the parable states, the end result was what mattered to the lord of the servants. They were productive and fruitful, pleasing him, and compelling him to bless them in ways they had never imagined. The Lord will continue to expand your ministry if he can trust you with what he has already entrusted you with.
Your neighbor's list of credentials may go on for days but never allow that to diminish what lies within you. Our gifts are not to be compared with one another. All that God is concerned about is our attitude and willingness to serve. Maybe we have the gift of helps. Scripture states, "'And whoever gives one of these little ones only a cup of cold water in the name of a disciple, assuredly, I say to you, he shall by no means lose his reward.'" (Matthew 10:42) Jesus is telling us here that offering up a cup of cold water to a fellow brethren is by no means miniscule in His eyes. It is not overlooked. How much you pour into that cup is not as significant as your desire to offer it to someone in need.
It is apparent in John Milton's poem that he was tormented by the implications of the parable Jesus revealed through scripture. Like the last servant who buried his talent, he fears that his lack in obedience is what led to his blindness. He has wasted precious years pouring dirt over his gift, the very thing that drives him to write. As a result, he believes that the Lord took away his sight, leaving him with nothing left but to consider how his light [or life] should have been spent.
All of our deliberating can be debilitating. Instead of pondering on the how's, where's, and why's. Ask yourself this question: Is there a talent I have buried because of laziness, procrastination, feelings of inferiority, or just plain fear? Remember that God has granted us these gifts. Just as the Lord gave, the Lord can also take away. (Job 1:21 [para]) Have you ever wondered why you lose passion or zeal when you walk away from your calling? I attribute it to what was revealed through scripture. You can hide your gifts for so long, but that would be destructive and unfruitful. You can choose to use your gifts for selfish motives, but remember if you are not using them to serve, then they serve no purpose!
I oftentimes battle procrastination and, just like Milton, wonder about the greater influence I could have in the world around me if I spent more time shining my light and less time spending it in the darkness of fear. I suppose my fear rises out of insecurities that my "one talent" is just too insignificant to make a difference. But I intend to remind myself, and I pray you do the same, that for every "one talent" I bury, one soul remains blind. That is a huge burden to bear, far greater than my own insecurities. I, like the two servants in the parable, want to make my Lord proud and as a result enjoy the service-filled, purpose-driven life God has for me.
When I consider how my light is spent,
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one talent which is death to hide
Lodged with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest He returning chide;
"Doth God exact day-labor, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies, "God doth not need
Either man's work or His own gifts. Who best
Bear His mild yoke, they serve Him best. His state
Is kingly: thousands at His bidding speed,
And post o'er land and ocean without rest;
They also serve who only stand and wait."
After doing some research on John Milton, I found that he was in fact a Protestant. He was so swept up in the theological controversy of his era, that he dedicated his life and works to exposing the thread woven between God and the human condition. In some of his earlier works, Milton shares with his audience his desire to fulfill a life of servitude but grows anxious at the thought that time is not on his side. By the time Milton wrote "When I Consider How My Light Was Spent", he was 43 years old and completely blind. It is here that John Milton's tonal shift is felt. He was at one point a burning flame eager to fulfill God's will, but in this hilighted selection, the flame appears to be squelched. He is plagued with loss and sadness. Perhaps he has evaluated his life and regrets time passed, the very time spent walking away from his calling. Now that he is blind, he doubts if he is of any use at all.
A day prior to being introduced to this poem, I awoke very early in the morning. I turned on the soft glow lamp that resides by my couch, medidated, and prayed. It was then that God did something spectacular (nothing new for Him of course)! I felt a nudge in my spirit to stretch out both of my hands in an attitude of receiving. So, I did. I felt the Lord tell me that he was placing ten coins in my right hand and five coins in the other. He asked me which felt heavier. I felt a weight pierce through the palm of my left hand and my arm suddenly grew weak. I questioned this. Clearly, he had placed more coins in my right hand. I shuffled around in my back pack for my Bible, the living, breathing Word, and randomly opened to Matthew 25:14-30.
I am sure many of you are familiar with the parable Jesus told about the man who distributed his "talents" (a form of currency) to his three servants. As the story goes, he had plans to be away from his place of residence for some time. Before doing so, he left five talents with one servant. To the second servant, he gave two talents. Finally, the third servant received one talent. Scripture states he gave "to each according to his own ability." (Matthew 25:15) The man returns after some time and expects each servant to account for the money that was given him. The first two servants reveal to their lord that they invested the talents and received double their portion in interest. Their lord responds stating, "Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord." (Matthew 25:23) Then it was time for the third servant to account for the coin that was given to him. He admits to his lord that he buried his one talent because he was "afraid". (Matthew 25:25 [para]) "But his lord answered and said to him, 'You wicked and lazy servant, you knew that I reap where I have not sown, and gather where I have not scattered seed. So you ought to have deposited my money with the bankers, and at my coming I would have received back my own with interest." (Matthew 25:27) At the end of the parable, their lord takes the one talent from the last servant and gives it to the servant that has ten. He then casts out the "unprofitable" servant into "outer darkness". (Matthew 25:30 [para])
I encourage you readers to apply this scripture to your personal walk with God. We are all the Lord's servants, in whom He has entrusted particular talents. We may choose to sow these talents into the kingdom of heaven or not. That is our choice. I am not necessarily talking about our monetary investment. I am more or less referring to time invested, using the gifts God has dipersed amongst us to edify one another and most importantly, to reap a harvest of souls. "'The harvest truly is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.'" (Matthew 9:37-38) Just as the parable states, the end result was what mattered to the lord of the servants. They were productive and fruitful, pleasing him, and compelling him to bless them in ways they had never imagined. The Lord will continue to expand your ministry if he can trust you with what he has already entrusted you with.
Your neighbor's list of credentials may go on for days but never allow that to diminish what lies within you. Our gifts are not to be compared with one another. All that God is concerned about is our attitude and willingness to serve. Maybe we have the gift of helps. Scripture states, "'And whoever gives one of these little ones only a cup of cold water in the name of a disciple, assuredly, I say to you, he shall by no means lose his reward.'" (Matthew 10:42) Jesus is telling us here that offering up a cup of cold water to a fellow brethren is by no means miniscule in His eyes. It is not overlooked. How much you pour into that cup is not as significant as your desire to offer it to someone in need.
It is apparent in John Milton's poem that he was tormented by the implications of the parable Jesus revealed through scripture. Like the last servant who buried his talent, he fears that his lack in obedience is what led to his blindness. He has wasted precious years pouring dirt over his gift, the very thing that drives him to write. As a result, he believes that the Lord took away his sight, leaving him with nothing left but to consider how his light [or life] should have been spent.
All of our deliberating can be debilitating. Instead of pondering on the how's, where's, and why's. Ask yourself this question: Is there a talent I have buried because of laziness, procrastination, feelings of inferiority, or just plain fear? Remember that God has granted us these gifts. Just as the Lord gave, the Lord can also take away. (Job 1:21 [para]) Have you ever wondered why you lose passion or zeal when you walk away from your calling? I attribute it to what was revealed through scripture. You can hide your gifts for so long, but that would be destructive and unfruitful. You can choose to use your gifts for selfish motives, but remember if you are not using them to serve, then they serve no purpose!
I oftentimes battle procrastination and, just like Milton, wonder about the greater influence I could have in the world around me if I spent more time shining my light and less time spending it in the darkness of fear. I suppose my fear rises out of insecurities that my "one talent" is just too insignificant to make a difference. But I intend to remind myself, and I pray you do the same, that for every "one talent" I bury, one soul remains blind. That is a huge burden to bear, far greater than my own insecurities. I, like the two servants in the parable, want to make my Lord proud and as a result enjoy the service-filled, purpose-driven life God has for me.
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